Pre-E3 2011 Special

Ron, Alex, Xzyliac and special guests Apathy, Monodi and Daxelman discuss Project Cafe, PlayStation Vita, controller mock-ups, Battlefield 3, Mass Effect 3, DMC, Final Fantasy, and so, so much more in this all-E3 2011 special!

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Episode 16: Kevin? Kevin! KEVIN! (Quick and Dirty Edition)

As the summer fast approaches, what better way to cool off than to hang out with the four chillest bros in all of videogame podcasting? It can only be another rip-roaring, cataclysmic, but also quite docile episode of Start > Select > Talk! This week, the crew are joined by Alex’s friend Ryan out of weird necessity and hilarity/chaos/impromptu conversations about videogames and not-videogames commence! In this week’s edition, the crew covers such topics as:

• Namco Bandai announced videogames and then we talked about the videogames that were announced by Namco Bandai who announced some videogames.
• The entire plot of Doctor Who.
• Dumb names for anticipated games.
• EXCLUSIVE: Soul Calibur V to feature Edmund Blackadder and Basil Fawlty.
• Skype on the Xbox. Somebody probably has opinions on it.
• This year’s E3: what we expect and what we want.

Does your daily commute invite thoughts of suicide, depression and existential crisis? Doctor Internet prescribes a healthy download of Start > Select > Talk once per week straight from the iTunes store! Simply search “start select talk” on iTunes and you too can experience the medical wonder that is four people talking over each other about videogames for an hour and a half!

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Episode 15: We Are Ron Taylor

Another episode of Start > Select > Talk has appeared from the depths of the internet, springing upon the masses like a serial killer in the night! Prepare to be stabbed by the dagger of videogame opinions as the regular crew – finally together for the first time in 25 years – discuss the forever fascinating, fluctuating and fabulous business of videogames and the interactive joy-discs they produce for us, the happy consumer. Unless you bought Uncharted, in which case you’re just fucking stupid. This week, the crew’s victims include some of the hottest topics of discussion in the industry today, including:

• BLAH BLAH BLAH I’M RON BLAH BLAH.
• Alex doesn’t play videogames anymore.
• PSN is still down, which is fascinating.
• IGN and 1up are merging and it’s terrible
• Mass Effect 3 is delayed. Boo hoo.
• And more!
  

By the way, nobody likes you. But if you subscribed to Start > Select > Talk via the iTunes store allowing you to download the podcast automatically each week and take it with you wherever you go, they might start to! Though they’ll still have to get past your hideous complexion and horrendous personality.

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(The music used in this episode is, “Yuna’s Theme” from Final Fantasy X-2, “Confrontation” from Soul Calibur II, and Jonathan Coulton’s, “Shop Vac”.)

An Important Announcement

You may be unaware, but it takes a lot of work and sacrifice to record Start > Select > Talk every week. We have to leave behind our families, our friends and our duties elsewhere to gather in at the same time, dedicating hours of our time to the recording, editing and publishing of an episode. It’s taken its toll on the crew, and so I’m afraid we have had to make a very hard decision. You may not like it, and we certainly don’t, but it was unavoidable.

Start > Select > Talk has, regrettably, had to move recording time to Thursday.

I know. I know.

But put down the Kleenex, dear listener! The podcast will be going up weekly on Sundays, which means that you can take the show into work or school the next Monday morning and maybe – just maybe – you’ll be slightly less inclined to overdose on ibuprofen and end it all just like your so-called friends and family silently wish you would! Happy days!

Also, nobody loves you.

Episode 14: Iwata’s Mother’s Cookies

Jeepers Creepers strikes again, this time claiming the life of Xzyliac! Now two women down, Ron and Alex enlist the help of internet person Dan McKenney to fulfill the most important task in the universe: talk about videogames on the internet a bit. This week, the cast is also joined by the President of the Nintendo Corporation, Satoru Iwata who speaks to the crew all the way from Japan, talking about his exciting weekend, his mother’s baking and his underdeveloped social skills. Want to know what the crew talked about this week? Well holy shit-in-a-bucket do I have the bullet-pointed list for you! It goes as thus:

• Some more talk about Portal.
• Wii 2 details are confirmed! Apathy abound!
• PSN is down. Oh well.
• The ending of Red Dead Redemption is ruined…again.
• Xzyliac does return in the final 10 minutes, and completely ruins the awesome Jeepers Creepers running joke we had. NICE WORK, DOUCHEBAG.

Want to show your friends, family and pets how awesome your taste in podcasts is on the go? Don’t forget to subscribe to the show on iTunes, and every week some kind of stupid magic technology thing will allow you to take the show wherever you go, any time of day!

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(The music in this episode is “Pork and Beans” by Weezer, “Control” by Kid Sister, and “Still Alive” by Jonathan Coulton form his live album, “Best. Concert. Ever.”)

Doctor Who Special: The Impossible Podcast

WE TALKED ABOUT DOCTOR WHO AND BISCUITS AND TELLTALE AND THEN WE GOT FUCKING SICK OF OUR LIVES AND OVERDOSED ON IBUPROFEN

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(Happy Easter from everybody at SST <3)

Episode 13: Fuckin’ Portals, Man

Now that Jeepers Creepers has claimed Molly for good (we assume) the crew welcomed the lovely Jen Shaffer from +10 Charisma, a rival podcast which shall be the first to perish when our thousand year Reich is finally realised and we sweep the internet with a force so great it could knock the kidneys out of a herd of buffalo. After abandoning the search for Molly’s body, the crew got down to serious videogame related (kinda) business and discussed such riveting subjects as:

• Jen tries to spoil Portal 2 for everyone, giving Xzyliac and Alex no reason to live.
• Batman Batman Batman Batman Batman Batman
• The Wii 2 will be useless and bad.
• The NGP will be useless and bad.
• Sonic Generations: a harbinger of regression for the franchise?
• Where DO babies come from?

Want to give praise to your podcasting overlords on the go? You can subscribe to us through the iTunes store, and every week have the show downloaded to your PC in STEREOSCOPIC SURROUND SOUND ready to listen or transfer to your portable audio-emitting device of choice!

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(The music featured in this episode is “Troublemaker” by Weezer, “As Far As I Can See” by Phantogram, and “Can’t Catch A Break” composed by Masashi Hamauzu for Final Fantasy XIII)

Episode 12: Hydra’s Dogma

Molly was not present this week, because she had to go talk to people in real life like some kind of person-talk-to-er. In the mean time, Ron, Alex and Xzyliac got together to do something far more important for the safety and wellbeing of the human race: talking about videogames for a couple of hours on the internet. We know where our priorities lie, Carroll.

Whilst recovering from their betrayal, the men got down to goddamn business and discussed such very very very very very important things as:

• Dragon’s Dogma breaks the boundaries of what it means to be a videogame.
• Hydras really need to be in more games.
• Dead Rising 2 is dragged out again like a tired prostitute for our collective groping.
• Resident Evil? More like Resident UNIMPRESSIVE HANDS ON DEMO! HEY-OOO!
• Mass Effect 3: Ron and Xzyliac speculate whilst Alex has a hissy fit like a child.
• Games we defend even though they’re bad.

Do you have iTunes? If so, you can subscribe to the podcast for free and have the show downloaded via MAGIC every week! If you don’t, I’ll tell everyone you’re gay. I mean everyone.

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(The music used in this week’s episode is “How You Like Me Now?” by The Heavy, the galaxy map theme from Mass Effect, “New Worlds” composed by Jack Wall for Mass Effect 2 and Fanfarlo’s “Atlas”.)

Episode 11: Welcome to Rape Country

Bored? Alone? On the internet? Why watch pornography when you can bathe in the dulcet tones and rich verbal textures of the internet’s bestest videogames podcast ever made ever by any person, organisation or sea creature ever? Listen to this week’s orgasmic episode of Start > Select > Talk – it lasts longer and a happy ending is guaranteed!*

Still not convinced? Starting to get annoyed with the constant questions? Are you? ARE YOU? Then let me tell you about the exciting topics the crew discuss in this edition! They include, but are by no means limited to:

• Molly hates Secrets of Mana and thus all videogames forever
• The bullshit of Fallout: New Vegas’ ending
• Gamers Heart Japan and the fact that you should watch it
• ANGRY TEENAGERS ON THE INTERNET HATE SONY RAH RAH RAH
• What superheroes should get their own games?
• Siblings and videogames: What are? How do? Why?

You can listen to the show or download the mp3 using the regular links, but why do that when you can subscribe to us via the iTunes store? It makes you more attractive and you should do it.

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(*Only applicable to those who enjoy being told to fuck off by a depressed Brit)

(The music used in this episode consists of Cold War Kids’ “Rubidoux”, the “Mission Complete” theme from Final Fantasy X-2, and Coldplay’s “Speed of Sound”.)

Episode 10: The Best Podcast of All Time

You know, ten is a fascinating number. You have ten fingers on your hands. You have ten toes on your feet. There are ten serial killers hiding under your bed right now. Ten is all around us and now, it’s in your audio-procuring technological devices with the tenth episode of everybody’s favourite podcast tangentially linked to videogames, Start > Select > Talk!

As the show enters double-digits, the team welcomes fan-favourite Xzyliac onto the show in his first episode as a permanent fourth chair with all the fanfare of a Brazilian street parade as seen through the eyes of a coked-up schizophrenic! Doubly exciting is the plethora of news and topics discussed by the crew which includes but is by no means limited to:

·         Kanye West is shit.

·         Something to do with videogames, presumably.

·         Kanye West is really really shit.

Not satisfied with just having your weekly dose of people talking loudly at you on your personal computer? You can subscribe to us for the princely sum of ZERO MONEY on the iTunes store! Simply search “start select talk” and soon you’ll be able to carry the joy of Ron being called out for his stupidity everywhere you go!

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(The music used for this week’s episode is “Sue Promise” composed by Tosihiko Sahasi for The Big O, Coldplay’s “Chinese Sleep Chant” and Kanye West’ “Gold Digger”.)